What is Autism?
- Eva Bruchez
- Nov 10, 2024
- 14 min read
Exploring Its Origins, Gender Differences, and the Hidden Challenges of Misdiagnosis
Autism Spectrum Disorder (ASD) is a unique way of experiencing the world, often with layers that aren’t immediately visible. While most people know about traits like struggles with social cues or sensitivity to sounds and textures, what’s often missed is the inner experience—how autistic brains are wired, how emotions are processed, and how autistic individuals adapt to a society that doesn’t always “get it.”
Autism is a spectrum, meaning it encompasses a wide range of traits and experiences that vary in intensity and expression, making it less about ticking boxes and more about understanding individual differences in how people think, feel, and interact with the world. It's like a color wheel, with each individual having their own unique blend of shades and hues—some bright, some muted, and all overlapping in different ways.
Lately, there’s been a big rise in adults being diagnosed with autism—especially women, people with ADHD, and those who are gifted. Why? Because these overlapping neurodivergences can make autism harder to spot. The ability to “mask” autistic traits—whether by mimicking social behaviors or leaning into their other strengths—can mean the traditional tools used to diagnose autism often miss the mark, leaving many feeling misunderstood or unsupported.
This article takes a closer look at autism from different angles, like the psychology behind it, how it shows up differently in men and women, and how ADHD and giftedness can hide autistic traits. Plus, we’ll dive into real-life examples to show how these overlaps shape the experience of living with autism.
5 General Traits of Autism
1. Preference for Structure and Predictability
Autistic people often feel most comfortable with routines, as predictability reduces anxiety and sensory overload. When plans suddenly change, it can feel destabilizing, leading to stress or shutdowns.
Examples:
Always doing laundry and shopping on a fixed day of the week, eating meals at the same time every day, little flexibility in times to walk the dog or go to the gym.
Shopping at the same store every week to avoid surprises in layout or sensory experiences.
Planning holidays in detail, including the activities, where to eat, how to get there, and what to pack.
2. Social Interaction Differences
Socializing often feels like a puzzle, with unspoken rules and cues that are hard to decode. Autistic individuals may struggle to connect or feel drained after interacting with others.
Examples:
Small talk feels awkward or exhausting, but predictable, low-pressure interactions or deep, one-on-one conversations where they are in more control, are more enjoyable.
Clear instructions in group settings help, and texting or phone calls are preferred over video calls.
Crowded events are avoided due to noise and social demands, and even running into a neighbor can feel overwhelming enough to retreat indoors.
3. Intense Special Interests
Autistic individuals often have passionate interests they dive into with incredible focus and dedication. For some, these interests are lifelong; for others, they shift over time but remain a central source of joy and relaxation.
Examples:
Spending hours, weeks, months researching a favorite topic, like wildlife, ancient history, or coding.
Collecting and categorizing objects, such as stamps or books, with precision.
Using a special interest as a calming escape during stressful times.
4. Sensory Sensitivities
Autistic individuals experience the world through heightened or reduced sensory perception.
Examples:
Being unable to concentrate in a room with fluorescent lights or background noise.
Finding certain fabrics or tags in clothing intolerable.
Enjoying strong sensory input, like deep pressure from weighted blankets or repetitive sounds, as calming stimuli.
5. Emotional Regulation and Shutdowns
Emotions can feel overwhelming, and regulating them isn’t always easy. Many autistic people experience meltdowns (externalized emotional overload) or shutdowns (internalized withdrawal).
Examples:
Struggling to verbalize frustration and instead withdrawing for hours or days.
Replaying a perceived mistake or awkward moment long after it happened.
Needing alone time after social events to recharge emotionally and physically.
What Makes Autism Unique?
To truly understand autism, it helps to explore it from different angles.
1. The Brain’s Wiring: Hyper-Connectivity
One of the most fascinating differences in autistic brains lies in synaptic pruning. This is a fancy term for how the brain “cleans up” extra neural connections during development. Pruning plays a big role in how we process information, handle emotions, and interact with the world around us.
Why: The differences in autistic brains may stem from a combination of genetic predisposition, epigenetic changes influenced by environmental factors, and early experiences like sensory overload or trauma, which shape how neural connections are strengthened or preserved.
How Pruning Works
In Neurotypical Brains: Between early childhood and adolescence (2–16 years old), the brain starts clearing out the neural connections it doesn’t use much and strengthens the important ones. This makes everything work more efficiently—kind of like organizing a cluttered desk so you can find what you need without distractions. This “neat and tidy” brain wiring helps neurotypical people focus, filter out distractions, and process social cues more smoothly.
In Autistic Brains: The pruning process isn’t as effective, which means the brain holds onto a lot of extra connections. This creates hyper-connectivity, where more information is processed all at once. While this can be an amazing superpower—like noticing patterns and details others miss—it also means the brain can get overwhelmed by sensory, emotional, and social input.
What It Feels Like
Imagine being in a room with ten radios, each tuned to a different station.
A neurotypical brain would naturally “turn down” or ignore the stations it doesn’t need and focus on just one.
An autistic brain, with hyper-connectivity, might hear all ten radios equally, trying to make sense of everything at the same time. This can make it harder to focus on one thing, but it also gives a richer, more detailed picture of everything happening.
This difference in pruning and processing shows that autism is about having a brain that works differently. Autistic individuals often feel deeply, but the large amounts of sensory and emotional input they’re juggling can make it hard to express their feelings in a neurotypical way.
2. The Inner World: Emotional and Psychological Experience
Autism isn’t just about how the brain is wired and how someone interacts with the world—it’s also about what’s going on inside. Autistic people often experience emotions and relationships in a way that’s deep, layered, and uniquely their own. It’s like their inner world is on overdrive, filled with intense feelings and nonstop thoughts, but this doesn’t always show on the outside.
Emotionally Intense: For many autistic people, emotions aren’t just feelings—they can be like waves crashing over them. Happiness might feel electric, sadness might feel physically draining, and frustration can feel like a storm brewing inside. But expressing or managing these emotions can be tricky, and when they don’t show them in expected ways, people might wrongly assume they don’t care.
Deep Thinkers: Autistic people often think in layers, constantly analyzing everything—from what someone said to why they said it, to what it means in the bigger picture. This can make them incredibly insightful, but it can also be exhausting when their brains won’t stop replaying moments or overthinking every little detail.
Empathy Misunderstood
One of the biggest misconceptions about autistic people is that they are “less empathetic.” But here’s the truth: many autistic people actually feel more empathy than neurotypicals because of all the extra sensory information coming in—they just process it differently!
Sensory Overload and Emotional Intensity: That extra flood of information can make it harder to express empathy in ways people expect.
What It Feels Like: Imagine trying to comfort a friend while standing in a noisy, crowded train station with flashing lights and blaring announcements. You’re juggling your emotions, their emotions, and the chaos around you. That’s often how it feels for an autistic person dealing with empathy and sensory overload at the same time.
The Misconception: Because their response might look different—like needing to step away to calm down—others may assume they don’t care or don’t “get it.”
3. Gender Expectations: How Society Shapes Autism
Society has a huge impact on how autism is noticed—or overlooked. For a long time, doctors mostly studied boys, so the traits they looked for didn’t match how autism often shows up in girls and women. This has left a lot of people flying under the radar, misdiagnosed, or simply misunderstood.
Society’s Double Standards
Here’s the tricky part: society expects women to be naturally social, empathetic, and emotionally adaptable—all things that can clash with autistic traits. For example if a woman avoids eye contact or small talk, people might label her as rude or shy instead of realizing she’s autistic. If she’s really good at masking, no one notices she’s struggling because she looks “fine” on the outside.
Gender plays a significant role in how autism is expressed and perceived, with women often masking their traits more than men. This can delay or obscure diagnosis.
Aspect | Men | Women |
Social Behavior | May appear blunt, avoid eye contact, or struggle with group settings. | Often appears socially skilled but overanalyzes interactions, leading to exhaustion. |
Special Interests | Focuses on “technical” topics like trains, coding, or collectibles. | Interests seem more “socially acceptable” and therefore missed (e.g., animals, psychology, books) but are pursued with equal intensity. |
Communication | Factual, monotone, or overly direct. | Overcompensates with charm or humor but struggles with emotional subtleties. |
Sensory Sensitivities | Reacts visibly to loud noises, bright lights, or uncomfortable textures. | Suppresses reactions in public but has private shutdowns to recover. |
Emotional Regulation | Outward frustration or withdrawal when overwhelmed. | Internalizes emotions, leading to anxiety, depression, or feelings of inadequacy. |
This mismatch between how autistic women feel inside and how they’re expected to act can lead to years of frustration, feeling misunderstood, and not getting the support they need. Understanding how society’s expectations shape autism is key to recognizing it in all its forms—especially the ones that have been hidden in plain sight.
Misdiagnosis: When Autism Hides Behind Other Conditions
Autism can be difficult to spot when it overlaps with traits of giftedness or ADHD, as these conditions often disguise the underlying challenges of being autistic. Gifted individuals, for example, are frequently seen as having it all together emotionally because they can use their intelligence to rationalize or explain their feelings. They may appear emotionally “in control,” but inside, they might feel overwhelmed by their intense empathy or sensitivity. This ability to articulate and analyze their emotions can make it easy for others to dismiss their struggles as quirks or eccentricities rather than recognizing them as autistic traits.
Similarly, ADHD can hide autism in a different way. ADHD’s fast-moving focus and impulsivity might make someone seem carefree or even hyper-social, bouncing from one emotion or activity to the next. This whirlwind energy can overshadow the deep, reflective side of autism, where an individual might still be replaying emotional moments or analyzing social interactions internally. Their outward behavior often distracts from the quieter, more introspective autistic traits that don’t fit the ADHD stereotype.
When autism overlaps with either giftedness or ADHD—or both—it creates a unique mix that can make it difficult to identify, even for professionals and the individual itself. These overlaps often lead to misdiagnosis or missed diagnosis altogether, as the more visible traits of giftedness or ADHD take center stage. For instance:
Anxiety or Depression: Secondary struggles caused by sensory overload or social rejection are often treated as the main issue, without addressing the underlying autism.
Borderline Personality Disorder (BPD): Emotional intensity and difficulty regulating feelings in autistic women are sometimes misinterpreted as mood swings associated with BPD.
Trauma Responses: Traits like hypervigilance or social withdrawal might overlap with PTSD, making it hard to differentiate between trauma and autism.
ADHD: Impulsivity, hyperactivity, and executive function struggles in ADHD can mirror or mask autistic traits, leading to an incomplete picture.
Giftedness: Intellectual strengths can overshadow sensory or social struggles, causing autistic traits to be dismissed as just “quirks” or eccentricities.
This confusion isn’t just frustrating—it can delay proper support. When autism goes unrecognized, the treatments for conditions like anxiety or ADHD might not address the root causes, leaving individuals feeling stuck and misunderstood. Understanding how giftedness and ADHD can mask autism is key to recognizing the whole person and providing the right strategies for growth and well-being.
Real-Life AUTISM Examples & How IT SHOWS UP WITH ADHD and Giftedness IN THE MIX
Autism doesn’t always look the way people expect, especially when ADHD or giftedness is part of the picture. These real-life examples show how autism can blend with other traits, creating unique challenges and strengths that often go unnoticed.
1. Sensory Overload in Social Settings
Autistic Experience: An autistic person might find a noisy party overwhelming—the music feels too loud, the conversations blur together, and they struggle to filter what’s important. They might leave early, feeling drained and irritable and need hours or days of down-time afterwards.
With ADHD: Someone with both ADHD and autism might find the party less draining because their ADHD gives them dopamine spikes from the novelty and excitement. They might enjoy bursts of the event but still crash afterward, feeling exhausted once the stimulation wears off, but this may only last an hour or two.
With Giftedness: A gifted autistic person might hyper-focus on a single conversation or mentally “zone out” by diving into their thoughts about a niche interest. This coping strategy can make their sensory overload less noticeable to others.
Why Traditional Assessments Might Miss It: A typical autism screening might ask, “Do you avoid parties because they’re overwhelming?” If the answer is “no” (because ADHD or giftedness helps them cope), it can lead to a missed diagnosis.
2. Social Exhaustion After Shopping
Autistic Experience: A trip to a busy shopping mall might feel overwhelming, with bright lights, background music, and crowds creating a sensory “attack.” An autistic person might need hours or days of silence to recover afterward.
With ADHD: ADHD’s thrill-seeking nature might make the trip feel exciting, at least temporarily. They might enjoy the stimulation in the moment but still feel drained later - that might last less long than in autism-only individuals.
With Giftedness: A gifted person might create mental distractions—like analyzing store layouts or observing patterns in product design—to stay engaged, masking their discomfort.
Why Traditional Assessments Might Miss It: Standard autism tests often focus on extreme sensory avoidance and the length of recovery. If the individual doesn’t avoid shopping altogether or just likes a little down-time afterwards, they might not meet the criteria, even if they experience significant sensory challenges.
3. Navigating Conversations
Autistic Experience: Conversations can feel like a puzzle, with unspoken rules and subtle cues that are hard to decode. An autistic person might replay the interaction later, overanalyzing every word.
With ADHD: ADHD’s impulsivity might make the person jump into conversations enthusiastically, masking their difficulty with social cues and rely on their perception of being eccentric. They might seem outgoing, but later regret saying too much or misreading the room and can ruminate in silence for hours or days.
With Giftedness: Gifted individuals might use their intelligence to mimic neurotypical behavior, appearing socially skilled. However, this “performance” leaves them mentally drained and questioning their authenticity.
Why Traditional Assessments Might Miss It: Questions like “Do you struggle to maintain conversations?” might not apply if ADHD keeps them engaged or even lead the conversation or giftedness helps them “fake it.”
4. Group Activities or Teamwork
Autistic Experience: Group activities can feel overwhelming for an autistic person because of the unspoken dynamics and chaotic nature of multiple people talking or working simultaneously. They might struggle to keep up with quick shifts in topics or tasks, often feeling excluded or misunderstood. Afterward, they may need significant downtime to recover from the mental effort and sensory overload.
With ADHD: Someone with both ADHD and autism might enjoy the novelty and fast pace of group activities in the moment. ADHD’s dopamine-seeking behavior could keep them engaged, but they might still struggle to follow all the dynamics or remember key details later, leaving them feeling frustrated or like they didn’t contribute effectively.
With Giftedness: A gifted autistic person might overcompensate by taking on a leadership role, organizing tasks, or focusing intensely on one specific part of the project. Their contribution might make it seem like they’re thriving, but internally they might feel drained or disconnected from the group.
Why Traditional Assessments Might Miss It: Autism screenings often ask about avoiding group activities or difficulty working with others. If someone appears or feels highly engaged (thanks to ADHD) or competent (thanks to giftedness), their struggles with group dynamics might be overlooked.
5. Responding to Change or Unexpected Events
Autistic Experience: Sudden changes, like a canceled meeting or a surprise visitor, can feel destabilizing for an autistic person. They might need time to mentally adjust, and their reaction could come across as overly rigid or resistant to others.
With ADHD: ADHD’s love for novelty might initially mask discomfort with change, making the person appear adaptable (or even being the person who initiates change themselves), especially when it concerns changes in plans they like. However, they might still feel unsettled afterward, struggling to transition smoothly to the new plan due to their underlying need for predictability from autism, especially when it's a change requires that
With Giftedness: A gifted autistic person might intellectually rationalize the change, quickly coming up with a solution or reframing the situation for others. Outwardly, they seem calm and resourceful, but inside, they might feel disoriented and need time to recalibrate.
Why Traditional Assessments Might Miss It: Screenings often focus on clear signs of rigidity or resistance to change. If someone outwardly adapts (thanks to ADHD or their intellectual coping strategies), their internal struggle might go unnoticed.
6. Making Eye Contact
Autistic Experience: An autistic individual might naturally struggle with making eye contact, as it feels overwhelming or distracting. While talking to someone, their whole internal conversation might focus on "how to appear normal, look in the eye, look away". However, over time, individuals may develop unconscious coping mechanisms—like focusing on a person’s nose or mouth instead of their eyes—to appear neurotypical without even realizing they’re doing it. As a result, they may answer “no” to questions like “Do you avoid eye contact?” on autism tests, even though they’ve simply found a workaround for the discomfort.
With ADHD: ADHD’s impulsivity and focus shifts can further mask eye contact difficulties, as the person might frequently look away naturally, blending their autistic discomfort into ADHD behavior.
With Giftedness: A gifted individual might intellectually rationalize the need for eye contact and train themselves to fake it effectively, using their observational skills to imitate neurotypical behaviors. They might even receive praise for being “confident” or “attentive” despite feeling internally disconnected.
Why Traditional Assessments Might Miss It: Autism tests often ask direct questions about challenges, like avoiding eye contact or being socially awkward. These questions might not uncover the hidden coping mechanisms developed through a lifetime of masking, leading to missed diagnoses.
Living With Autism: Strengths, Challenges, and Moving Forward
Autism is a deeply unique way of experiencing the world, full of both incredible strengths and significant challenges. These strengths shine brightly, especially when autistic traits are embraced for what they are—gifts that offer new perspectives and talents. However, the challenges can feel overwhelming, particularly for those masking their autism under layers of ADHD or giftedness.
The Strengths of Autism
Autism offers extraordinary abilities that can enrich not just the lives of autistic individuals but the world around them:
Deep Focus: Autistic people often excel in their areas of interest, becoming true experts thanks to their unwavering dedication and curiosity.
Pattern Recognition: They can see connections that others miss, making them exceptional in fields that rely on problem-solving, innovation, or creativity.
Authenticity: Many autistic people value honesty, loyalty, and meaningful relationships, often bringing a sense of realness to their connections that others deeply appreciate.
The Challenges of Autism
Yet, autism also comes with challenges, which can be amplified when ADHD or giftedness is in the mix:
Sensory Overload: Crowded or noisy environments can feel unbearable, making everyday situations like shopping or commuting a daunting task.
Burnout: Years of masking—pretending to fit into a neurotypical world—can lead to extreme physical and emotional exhaustion, especially when combined with perfectionism or ADHD’s relentless pace.
Social Fatigue: Even short conversations or casual interactions can feel like a marathon, draining energy needed for other parts of life.
When ADHD overlaps, dopamine-driven bursts of excitement might temporarily delay burnout, but the eventual crash can be severe. Similarly, giftedness can mask struggles with perfectionism and overanalysis, making it harder for others to see the exhaustion beneath the surface.
Moving Toward Acceptance and Balance
Autism isn’t a problem to solve—it’s a different way of thinking, feeling, and being in the world. While the challenges can’t be ignored, neither can the strengths. By understanding and accepting autistic traits—whether in yourself or others—we create a world where those with autism can thrive, not just survive.
Here’s the key: support is about working with someone’s wiring, not against it. It’s about creating environments where sensory needs are respected, where honesty and authenticity are celebrated, and where masking isn’t necessary to be accepted.
Resources for Support and Exploration
If you’re looking to better understand how autism overlaps with ADHD and giftedness—or if you want to untangle these traits in yourself or someone you care about—there are tools and strategies that can help.
Profiling Work to Untangle Autism, ADHD, and Giftedness
I offer personalized profiling sessions designed to help you uncover the unique blend of traits that make up your neurodivergence. These sessions go beyond labels, focusing on:
Understanding how autism, ADHD, and/or giftedness interact in your life.
Recognizing your unique strengths and challenges.
Developing strategies to reduce overwhelm, increase calm, and create more joy in daily life.
Additional Resources to Explore
Books:
Unmasking Autism by Devon Price: A guide to embracing and understanding autistic traits.
NeuroTribes by Steve Silberman: A deep dive into the history and diversity of autism.
Your Rainforest Mind by Paula Prober: For understanding giftedness and its overlap with neurodivergence.
Final Thoughts
Autism isn’t about fitting into the mold of a neurotypical world—it’s about breaking the mold and showing new ways to think, feel, and connect. Whether you’re autistic, think you might be, or are supporting someone who is, remember that understanding and acceptance are key. The goal isn’t to “fix” autism; it’s to honor the unique strengths it brings while finding ways to navigate the challenges. By exploring your neurodivergence with curiosity and compassion, you can create a life that feels calm, balanced, and deeply fulfilling.or the inability to meet high personal standards, compounded by the emotional toll of masking.
Comentários